Confession

At the request of my sister, Amanda, I am going to share one of my deepest darkest secrets. A long long time ago when I was a wee lad I so enjoyed going to the movies to see the latest Disney Animated Classic. One of my favorites was Aladdin. I LOVED IT. I wanted to be him. I wanted to be him so much that I would think of ways that I could get my hands on a monkey and name it Abu. I couldn't wait until we had the technology or magic to have actual flying carpets. And I don't doubt that I even tried inventing a few on my own. 1992 was a magical year. My Grandma Karen even gave me Roller Blades for my birthday, they were all the rage at the time. I was even lucky enough to own and operate a Sony Walkman... the kind that played tapes. Everyday I would rush home from school, slap on my Roller Blades, put my Aladdin soundtrack in the tape player and hit the streets. A little silly, I know. But the truth is even better. I was really practicing for Aladdin on Ice. Everyday I would practice going backwards, doings twits, and skating on one leg. I was sure that with enough practice and determination the director would one day happen to drive down my street in his Porsche and see me skating. The breaks on his red 911 would come to a screeching halt as he was mesmerized by my moves. In my mind he wasn't a Dateline child predator, but if he were I could out skate his car. He would step out of his car, take another puff of his cigar and say, "Man, that kid's got talent." He would sign me on to skate as Aladdin, of course. I would travel the world, which at the time was shining shimmering and splendid. And that is how my wildest dreams were going to come true. That is really how I imagined it. Exactly how I imagined it. Oh, in 1992 I was in the 5th grade. I'm pretty sure that is too old for an Aladdin obsession, but in my defense I did know what a Porsche 911 was.